The Transgender Dictionary

Dating Advice

Table of Contents

Introduction

Dating is not something that is specific to transgender people, however the topic of transgender people often comes up in the dating world. Being transgender adds on challenges that cisgender people may not always experience. The internet and world is full of advice for typical cisgender men and women trying to navigate relationships, but not so much for transgender individuals.

This page is dedicated to very miscellaneous advice for relationships for various people. If you ignore advice given... well you can't say that you were not warned. Amongst the advice, there are various answers to commonly asked questions related to engaging in relationships with transgender people.

Clicking on underlined words throughout the page will lead you to definitions or pages with topics relating to said words. Clicking on links under [External Links] will lead you to other parts of the internet that are not affiliated with The Transgender Dictionary.

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General Information

People are quite predictible and tend to follow similar patterns of behavior. The thing about people is that everyone thinks that their particular situation is especially unique. They think that even with the same rotten formula that has doomed others (whether they know it or not) will somehow work out for them.

It will always be better to be single than to be in a relationship that makes you feel miserable.

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F.A.Q. For Heterosexual Men

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F.A.Q. For Heterosexual Women

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F.A.Q. For Transgender Women

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General Advice For Transgender Men

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F.A.Q. For Transgender Men

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F.A.Q. For Transgender or Nonbinary People (in general)

I am a transgender or nonbinary person in a relationship with a cisgender person who does not want me to transition or wants to limit my transition. Should I break up with them?
Yes.

I am a transgender or nonbinary person in a relationship with a cisgender person, and I am afraid that my cisgender partner will not accept me if I transition. Should I transition?
Yes, and you should break up with the cisgender partner if they do not accept and respect your transition.

I am a transgender or nonbinary person in a relationship with another transgender person whose sexual orientation contradicts with the nature of our relationship in a way that invalidates my gender identity. Should I break up with my partner?
Yes.

I am a transgender or nonbinary person in a relationship with someone who will break up with me if I transition. Should I transition?

Yes, your personal happiness and well-being should not be reliant on the validation on another person, but rather on happiness in your own self. It is more important that you be comfortable within your own body; rather than someone else be comfortable with your body. You are the one living in it.

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F.A.Q. For Lesbians

I am a lesbian attracted to a trans woman, am I still a lesbian?
Yes.

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F.A.Q. For Gay Men

I am a gay man attracted to a trans man, am I still a gay man?
Yes.

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General Advice

Not specific to any particular relationship type.

Scenario 1

If you are in a relationship with someone who has already hit you multiple times and makes you feel miserable, break up with them. If your partner refuses to use lube during sexual activities, break up with them.

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Scenario 2

If you are on dating/hook up apps [taimi, grindr, etc] and you are under the age of 21, avoid relationships with anyone 21+ as most of the people on these apps who are in the latter age range seeking out the former age range do not have good intentions. Even if they seem nice, it is safest to avoid them.

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Scenario 3

If your partner has hit you she will hit you again. Leave her.

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Scenario 4

If someone tells you that you seem like the type to spiral, stop talking to them.

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Scenario 5

If you are in a relationship with someone who already has [a] kid(s), and you find yourself doing the math and come to the conclusion that you are closer in age to [one or more] of said kid(s) than you are to the individual you are in a relationship with - this is a sign to end the relationship.

Chasers/Unicorn Hunters

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The resources below have been provided for education, information sourcing, and entertainment purposes. The views expressed in these videos, websites, etc, do not inherently reflect those of The Transgender Dictionary. These resources are not sponsored, nor endorsed.

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Additional Resources

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See also, sexuality page.

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